No Zytrons In Range

I recently sent a ticket to AMD/ATI about a problem I was having with a recently purchased video card. Their website was extremely confusing, so the ticket went in looking something like this:

Type of Inquiry: PC support
Bus Type: PCI Express
Operating System: WINDOWS VISTA
Driver Version: Other
Other Driver Version: 2007.1220.2143.38732
Category: Solve a Problem
Topic: Display
Sub-topic: Games
Graphics Manufacturer: MSI
Vendor: Not Sure
Application: Other
Application Name: Arx Fatalis
Product: Other MSI (Uncertified)

Summary: Use Centered Timings doesn’t work
Details: Your menu above is really confusing. The version number from the ATI thing is the 2007.1220.etc, but it only gives options for like 8.1, 8.2? Also, my Radeon 2600xt isn’t listed under MSI, does that mean it’s “uncertified?” What does “uncertified” mean?

Anyway, when I turn on the “Use Centered Timings” option for my Dell 20″ widescreen DVI monitor, Arx Fatalis still fills the entire screen when it switches the monitor mode to 1280×1024 (the maximum it supports), distorting the image. What do I need to do to get “Use Centered Timings” working correctly?

I count four questions there. Here’s the response:

SOLUTION

Based on our experience, lockups and hangs issues are usually due to improper
system configuration, driver issues, faulty hardware, or a known issue between
a given application, driver and hardware in use.

Please click the link below for more information:

https://support.ati.com/ics/support/default.asp?deptID=894&task=knowledge&questionID=28022

If the information above does not resolve your issue, please respond to your
ticket in order to get assistance from our qualified support representatives.

Thank you for choosing AMD!

I love the confidently-written word “Solution”, complete with boldface and all-caps, placed directly above a block of text which isn’t even close to being a solution to my problem. Not only did it not answer my four questions, it doesn’t answer any questions relevant to my ticket. I’m sure some computer randomly selected this response based on some keyword in my submission, but damned if I can even figure out what keyword it is.

All I can say to AMD/ATI is:

BTW, “Use Centered Timings” actually only works with non-standard resolutions. If you set your monitor to a standard resolution, like 800×600 or 1280×1024, it lets the monitor make the decision on whether to letterbox or scale it. After I put that ticket in, I went to the monitor controls and found the option on my monitor, so the problem is actually resolved now. I wouldn’t mind knowing why ATI even has that option, if it doesn’t work most of the time, but I guess that’ll remain a mystery.

(A pre-warning: don’t read this post if you don’t like extremely nit-picky complaints. No griping about it later on, you’ve been warned.)

Dear Microsoft,

What is this?

That might be a little hard to read, so let’s make it a bit bigger and call out exactly what I’m talking about:

What is that weird gap to the left of my network status notification area (or system tray) icon? Is that some other notification icon that just happens to be invisible and really skinny? Is that the network status icon taking extra space to use later? Or maybe Google dropped the ball and their Google Desktop icon (the one to the left) is taking more space than it needs.

Now I know why there’s space to the left of the clock, it’s to set it apart from the notification area. Is that mysterious gap supposed to represent a division between Microsoft-installed icons and third party ones? Is that what that is? Is it just a bug? Will it be fixed in the upcoming SP1?

I know it’s a tiny, stupid, petty thing, but it drives me nuts every time I look at the task bar.

A relatively recent Firefox update, I think maybe 2.0 when it came out, added a clever new feature. It saves a running log of your session so that, if Firefox crashes, the session can be restored as if it was working all along.

(Normally I’d gripe about Firefox crashing at all, but since it runs third-party code in the form of plug-ins, I suppose there’s not all that much the Mozilla Foundation can do about it. Being a Mac user from the Classic era, and remembering the horror of Extensions, I’m particularly forgiving on this front. The session restoring is better than nothing.)

The problem is what Firefox thinks an “interrupted session” is. Specifically, if Firefox is running and I log out, restart, or shut down, Firefox, the next time I start it up I’m presented with the annoying dialog box from hell: “Your last Firefox session closed unexpectedly:”

No, Firefox. It didn’t close unexpectedly. I chose “Log Out” from the goddamned menu, and I expected it to close. How else could I log out if my applications didn’t close? Der.

This presents two different possibilities, listed in order from kind of stupid to completely stupid:

1. The Mozilla Foundation believes that Firefox users are so stupid they won’t realize that the OS will have to close Firefox to restart.
2. The Mozilla Foundation is so stupid that they don’t realize that the OS will have to close Firefox to restart.

So what does Google have to do with this? Well, they’ve introduced a new plug-in for Firefox called Google Browser Sync which, well, it does pretty much what the name implies it does: it syncs all browser settings between multiple computers. It also, lo and behold, has a feature where it can save your session and restore it, much like Firefox’s built-in feature that does the same thing.

The only difference is what Google considers an interrupted session: Any time Firefox is closed, for any reason, your session is interrupted. Were you finished browsing? Doesn’t matter, if you close Firefox, your session was interrupted and Google Browser Sync will “helpfully” ask if you want to restore it.

Firefox’s definition of “interrupted session” is stupid. The OS telling Firefox to quit isn’t an “interrupted session” no matter how you look at it. But Google’s definition is beyond stupid, I’m afraid. My only question to the developers of Google Browser Sync: How do I end my Firefox session without interrupting it? Do you have to go back to your homepage before closing it? Or maybe go to “about:blank”? Whatever it is, please tell me.

Well, it’s only a matter of time before a Google executive finishes setting up their projector for the high-roller tech demo, opens up his copy of Firefox and sees this:

And the feature will be gone forever.

I guess I should write an update to my last posting about my crummy experience using Google Checkout to make a purchase.

I purchased my iFM and it was delivered, I signed for it, opened up the package and suffered extreme disappointment that the iFM doesn’t work with my iPod. Apparently, it relies on a little port that Apple used to put next to the headphone jack called the “remote port”. (See this delightfully crazy page to see what it looks like.) As you can see, virtually every iPod in existence, except my 30 GB video iPod, has a remote port right next to the headphone jack.

You’ll also notice that Griffin Technology actually has two versions of the iFM: one that works with my iPod, and one that doesn’t. Brilliant.

Five demerits to Apple, for removing a port that tons of iPod accessories relied on for no reason what-so-ever. Two-and-a-half demerits to Griffin Technology for upgrading a product without renaming it. (You can’t really blame Griffin as much when Apple does the same thing.)

So it’s been a terrible customer experience all around, and I still don’t have a working FM receiver for my iPod. I give up.

Small point, then the big point.

Small point, I heard from a friend that Google’s email service, Gmail, is now offering IMAP access to some percentage of accounts. I’ve been looking forward to this for ages, so I logged onto Gmail to see if my account had been set up with IMAP. It hasn’t, unfortunately, but there was a nice prevalent link on the help page named “What about IMAP?” Clicking it? 404 error. Good help there, Google.

Big point. Later I was lamenting the fact that it’s impossible to find a portable AM/FM radio with rechargable batteries, so that you could charge it like your cell phone or iPod and not have to constantly buy more expensive AAAs. That same friend found a product called Griffin iFM which actually plugs into your iPod and turns it into a radio, no batteries required, and even linked me to Google’s product search page of all the retailers selling the iFM.

The most affordable was from an outfit named Jepago. Never heard of them before, but Google supposedly vets these vendors before allowing them to use Google Checkout, and I trust Google more than most web companies, so I clicked the large “Google Checkout” link next to the product listing and proceeded to enter all my billing information– name, billing address, credit card number, expiration date, that little verification number on the back of the card. I hit “Submit” and waited. And waited. And waited. Five minutes later I gave up, resigned to having to call my credit card provider to reverse the charge that I know is coming. Or, at worst, to have to get a new card altogether as this sleazy company sells my credit card information to very crook in the US.

I’d like to tell Google how much Jepago sucks ass, but of course there’s no feedback link for stores. If it has the Google Checkout logo, it’s supposedly trusted and there’s nothing you can do to change Google’s mind, not even an email address to use. Crap.

The next retailer on Google product search with the iFM listed (Advanced Tech Toys) didn’t steal my card, but their site was terrible. When you created an account, it asked for an address but didn’t specify whether they wanted a shipping address or a billing address. I just took a wild-ass guess and put in my billing address. Next step in the process, it says it’s going to ship to the address I just entered, and if I want it shipped somewhere else I have to add another address to my “address book.” Fine; Amazon works fundamentally the same way. So I go to their address book, and it states clearly at the bottom that I’m only allowed one address. Strike two.

The third retailer I tried (priceparts.com) actually seemed to work on the first try, miracle of miracles.

Hey Google, your Google Checkout retailers all seem to suck. Please do a little bit of quality control, and filter out these scam companies and companies that don’t even have a working website. Thank you.

P.S. As I was typing this, I got an email from Jepago.com. Apparently they HAD processed my credit card and created an order, despite their website not working. Thank God, that means they’re probably not going to steal my credit card information, and hopefully there’ll be a human there that can cancel my order.